Reality Anyone?!?


We have the classic saying that guys are from Mars and girls are from Venus. Guys always complain that girls are impossible to understand and girls complain that guys are impossible to understand. But by the looks, both sexes are pretty similar and are of the same species. So what’s the problem here?

This question had me researching and reading for weeks. And I came to believe that the core of the problem is the difference in the way that guys and girls think. What it comes down to is that guys think with logic, while girls think with emotions. This seems to be the reason why a guy maybe frustrated with a girl’s sometimes irrational behavior in certain situations.

Girls aren’t very straight forward. In fact, they rarely say what they want. Instead, they use reverse psychology and goes around the bush asking the guy a series of questions till she gets the answer that she wants. However, if she does not get the answer that she wants, she’ll give the guy the “cold shoulder treatment”. Meanwhile, the guy is left clueless as to what has just happened. After which an argument usually takes place, which could have been easily avoided if the girl had just said what she really wanted.

When I asked them why they do this, most girls pretended not to know what I was talking about, or just simply replied with an “I don’t know” (I hate it when they say that!). I mean, just think about it! So many arguments can be avoided if girl just says what she’s actually thinking. But sadly, this is not how things work.

A good example is a couple out for a walk. The girl is thirsty so she says to the guy “would you like to get a drink?” the guy replies “no I’m not thirsty” and keeps going. She would then get mad over this because she didn’t get the answer that she expected, not realizing that what she said wasn’t actually what she was thinking. If she had just said “I’m thirsty, let’s get something to drink” I’m sure the guy would do just what she said without any questions.

This all leads back to the fact that girls think with their emotions, not logic. All guys aren’t psychics and some of them need everything spelled out from A to Z.

Because a girl’s behavior is affected by her emotions and her emotions are affected by her body chemistry and her body chemistry fluctuates from one month to the next, it can be expected that a girl would display such kinds of behavior that is a mystery to guys, whose body does not go through the constant monthly cycle of change.

Since this is genetically built into girls, there is nothing a guy can do but to be aware of it and try to understand it. Sorry guys! Cant help you on that one!

So my conclusion to this matter is that guys need to try harder to figure out what the girls are saying, as most of the time it’s not what they really mean. And Girls! You need to try harder to say what you really want without playing mind games with the guy, if you want the guy to do what you really want.

With all that said, whether this is possible to happen in real life is a completely different story :)

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Ruba said...

I was out with a friend last night and felt thirsty.
So I told him to stop the bike, went to the vending machine nearby and got myself a coke. No conversation needed.
Shan, dude, you've been going out with some wierd girls!

shan said...

velvette - this isnt about me :D just what i have seen happening between alotta couples...why would any of this happen to me? i'm the one who wrote it..so i'm completely aware of all of this..

shweetikle said...

hmm..im not surprised..after all this is coming from a guy *eye roll*

im sure i can write a thousand points if im gonna break urs *eye roll*

white flower said...

'some guys need everything spelled out from A to Z' ... well they shudnt... and if they are too dumb, they dont even deserve the girls they are going out with... girls doo play emotional mind games.. but thats only to figure out a guys true motives.. and guys also play emotional mind games... ususally involving a guilt trip... and they lie, dhigu mahchah aruvan..

shan said...

shweeet - too can write pages and pages..but then, ppl wont read it..hehe:D also hello! this is the topic that doesnt end! if you have something to say about guys, guys have something to say about the girls..and the worst part is..neither kinds runs outa things to say wen it comes to this argument..so the truth is, nobody wins!

white flower - once again you start generalizing..tsk tsk, "and they lie, dhigu mahchah aruvan" oh! you mean the same way that all girls claim that they are virgins..lol. girls lie too! mostly to get sympathy..

iecco said...

yupp agree with velvette...the same wimme...i was thirstyy and was cravvvvvin for popcorn just arnd 30 mins ago i told the guy what i wanted and it was in 5 mins i we stopped to a shop got a coke and some popcorn :)

seee im nt like that...
i guess then u are hearing things from some phsyco couples :P or else ur going out with some weird gurls...

i for once knows guys very well to play mind games with them :P so i dare not...i know their nature and behavior a lot :) hehe

nice post though!

shan said...

darkangel - thanks :D

.mini said...

hehe
i believe what you say is true
but!
my theory is that guys are dumb
girls are dumb too

hehe
so its just the communicating part dude!
we have to work on it a lil and everything would be fine
guy has to understand the girls emotional "actions!"
and girls have to understand that guys need a lil more logical explanation

what i said just now doesnt make any sense
so i take it back
what remains is that i commented :P

shan said...

.mini - thanks! what you said made more sense than u think! :)

kaiza shozey said...

saabahey shan.hehe. looks like u really absorb the conversations that fly around u dho?hehe. niiice. and i have to agree with shan here. mayb cos im a guy too. OR as u girls seem to be saying, MAYBE ive jes met the wrong side of the girl community too.

met a girl recently who shared everything with me and we grew really close.then one day she tells me that her friends were having probs with their bfs and suddenly jes like that she started avoiding me completely. tried so many times n in so many ways but to no avail. i still dunno whats going on. pick up the fone like once every 3days or so n that too for abt 5mins. i kept asking her over n over again jes to tell me whats going on and then she can avoid me all she wants after that. but the typical answer is "nothing is wrong. dont wory". :s. how does she expect me not to worry? we were talking like 4-5times a day, chatting like hell and then suddenly this with no explanation or anything. said that it had nothing to do with me. that it wasnt anything i said or did either. so whats the big deal? buneema KANNEYNGE dho ingeynee. :-S

Another girl, we used to talk all the time and used to msg each other all the time n got pretty close too. she too suddenly started avoiding. and the explanations would be nothings wrong. after about 3 months or so i got the reasons from a friend of hers. seems she thought i wanted to be more than friends cos i was being too nice to her. i wasnt even flirting. and even if she thought that why cant she jes talk about it. now she talks to me again jes like b4. but what a waste of time and so senseless. why cant they jes say whats going on. that would resolve all the misunderstandings if there were any involved.

Yet another one.keeps making senseless complains over n over again on diff occasions. whenever i ask whats going on, whats bothering her, why she is doing whatever she mite have done or look for reasons the answer would always be "i dont know" :s .more on the "ripped apart" post.

but then again i too have met some wonderful girls who are quite the opposite but the majority is like that. so have to agree with shan. we think too differently. maybe cos each sex is assuming and expecting too much out of the opposite sex. we mite be the same species n all but we really are very different.and we should also accept the fact that we need each other more than anything else. thats the reason we were created afterall. we complete each other. no wonder we are different. we jes need to overcome our differences and together find a better way. right?

@velvette: good to hear that :D

~ange|~ said...

nice post,,, n been fun to read al these comments ehehe

shan said...

kaiza shozey - comment of the century goes to u man! i think that was longer than my post itself..hehe but i totally agree with u man. no man is complete without a woman..and no woman is complete without a man.

~angel~ - thanks alot :)

kaiza shozey said...

heheh. yea, i was thinking of writing a post but then again ur topic dude. ehenve alhaanulee. kurukoh fonikoh liyan feshy. but then again mashah 'angain naaraa teddy' ey kee kommeves kameh vegenthaa.hehe. varah obi posteh ingey

Chadz said...

Hehehehe...seems like the heat is on with the opposite sex's huh?

well my opinion on this wudnt last very long heck neways shan dude i shud agree most with you... on on behalf of u gurls it arnt that bad to see what the real thing is about...feel fresh no harm done wen it come down to such points you can go as far as u wish but you c da truth can never be revealed coz neither the guy or da gurl is capable of handlin dat without a shame so guys chill its a great post after all 10+ dude u rock...